Tag: dealing with fear

We’ve spent the last few weeks asking questions to help you explore the edges of your comfort zone in your work, your love life, and your spiritual path.

These are difficult questions.

Answering these questions forces us to admit that we have fears, and that our fears are holding us back from being and achieving all that we desire.

If you missed or shied away from any of the three questions, take a few minutes now to go back and answer it.

You can also ask a friend to help you. Close friends can often see the fears that we don’t let ourselves see.

Now that you’ve spent some time with these questions, pick one area and ask yourself:

What is one thing I can focus on for the next month to play at my edge?

Playing at the edge of our ability and comfort evokes a feeling of flow and helps us gain a sense of meaning and satisfaction in life.

The goal is not to get anywhere in particular (we will always have an edge we are unwilling to cross), but to recognize that the most satisfying way to live life is to constantly play with your edge and express the best version of yourself you can in the world.

You’ve probably heard the saying, “life begins at the end of your comfort zone.”

But how are we supposed to find the edges of our comfort zones so that we can push past them?

That’s what we’re going to focus on for the next few weeks of Quality Questions, starting right now.

The first thing you should know is that the fence around your comfort zone is fear.

It’s also helpful to recognize that you probably don’t have one single comfort zone. Instead, you have varying levels of comfort in different areas of life (relationships, work, spirituality, etc).

Let’s start with work. Ask yourself:

If you were truly fearless, what would you be doing to make a living?

What if you knew that you couldn’t fail?

And you weren’t worried about what anyone else would say.

Imagine if you could wave a magic wand and instantly change your reality.

What would you do then?

Think deeply about a means of making money that would make you feel fully alive.

Maybe your career would be more creative?

Perhaps you would commit to a global cause that you care about?

Maybe you would finally start the company you’ve been dreaming of?

Write down what a career without fear looks like and use that as a guide to the direction you should lean in your future choices.

Most of us spend huge amounts of time and energy worrying about the areas where our knowledge, skills, and abilities are lacking.

We look at a job ad and our eyes jump straight to the part of the job description that we don’t know how to do.

We’re acutely aware of the various ways we don’t measure up to some ideal — in our personal, social, and professional lives.

As a result, we live in a state of perpetual imposter syndrome. Always feeling like we’re not quite measuring up, because there is some aspect of life that we haven’t yet mastered.

In doing so, we often overlook our own growth. We forget all the things we have learned and the ways we have progressed.

This week’s question is a way for you to break that cycle.

Ask yourself: What used to be hard for me, but now is easy?

Think about your work, as well as your personal life — relationships, social situations, habits, health, etc. and make a list.

What skills have you mastered, obstacles overcome, or confidence have you attained?

Give yourself credit for all that you have already learned and done. 🎉

Then carry that feeling forward — there will always be new things to learn and try for the first time, but you should feel confident, because you’ve mastered new skills before.